Hooah! KCL ho! Second win of the month, gents.
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Yesterday, I sky-dived from a bomber jet. It was an amazing experience. I was using one of those new high-tech voice-activated parachutes, which are navigated by GPS to land exactly where you tell them to.
I landed at the far right table of my favorite cafe and ordered an espresso. For the entertainment of the regular visitors, I then took a single coffee bean, placed it on my tongue and spun it with such force that it created a tiny black hole around my mouth, which sucked in three grown men, a bottle of cognac and a double-parked Fiat "Punto".
I apologized for this little mishap to the cafe owner, paid for the cognac, and gave him my handcrafted Rolex from the future as a sign of my benevolence. This unique watch has the habit of letting you know when something nasty is about to happen to you. The only problem being that it's highly accurate, so it actually notifies you via a frantic buzzing sound exactly three nanoseconds before said nastiness. Of course, there is a section in the manual which explains how to increase this delay to something to the effect of 30 minutes, but I completely forgot it in the future.
All in all, was an amazing day yesterday.
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5 comments:
bullshit.
hohoho.
wait till lse offers u a place,
i guess by then u would be in the mental asylum already.
dude, i've missed you
make me a sandwich dripping with...words
triangle jesus molasses fmmmmmmm loverly sea-anemonemanemone
i don't know what kind of realisty you're escaping from, but don't worry, life is pretty shit for everyone.
pshic
ps: update, you sod, or at least drop me a line, it;s been a while :)
Oh and btw,
you scare me.
Although your header picture DOES have Natasha Bedingfield lyrics on it.
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